I had lost purpose, that is….. until I went skiing in the Missions yesterday! Deep snow in the steep alpine, coupled with the bush-whacky adventure exit was just the break I needed from winter planning and cleaning decades of spent hay from our listing, old barn. Working a bit on the farm and forge, it has been easy to forego recreation and self-care for the sake of knocking another item or so off the ever-growing list of things to do. It seems every time I’m just about through some task, a few more rise from its ashes.
Through all the sub-tasks, however, the larger overarching goals come into view and the vision of ‘the farm’ begins to take shape. Some might be lucky to define these things early on, but I’ve found that the culmination of the farm has been a moving target and will likely continue to be. But, the target has subtly slowed its movement in recent months due to a bit of new self-definition and clarity.
One conversation we have been having lately that has helped things slow down and granted more confidence in moving forward has centered on what ‘the things’ are that we should each be doing. These are things we are good at, that speak to us and after a full day of them, we are fulfilled. With so many balls in the air, and so many interests it’s almost as if we are trying to operate 30 different businesses between two people (hence our quest for interns). Sure, it’s Meridian Farm and Forge, but that ends up being pretty darn generalized when it comes down to nuts and bolts.
Thus, in recent months, things have focused. My luck has changed. The farm has come into clearer view. The things, as I see them, at the moment seem to be:
Farming: this vague, mis-used word which is usually associated with ‘growing stuff’, I believe is better defined as hitting shit with other, bigger shit. (Usually something made out of some hardened steel attached to a wooden handle or implement). Whether something grows or not, you are still farming, which also includes trying to grow things. But in the end, you did grow something, dug some dirt and fixed some device you originally thought was unfixable….you have found satisfaction.
Blacksmithing: perhaps more forgiving than carpentry and less so than making decent coffee, this craft is quite rewarding and relatively magical. In the most basic sense - you take something completely unbending, heat it up to incredible temperatures and then turn into something beautiful (or often times ugly), and/or quite useful. My fear is that this and other associated skills are lost in our new humanity as we rely too much on the wills and technologies of others and don’t grab the horns of our own ingenuity.
Everyone can do everything.
Baking: bread is delicious and very nourishing. Fresh bread even more so. With melted butter…. even more so. Enough said.
…. let’s try and ski a bit more too, eh?
Sounds like a good mix, right?
The funny thing is, ten years ago this was not my path and these were not things that I did. Ten years ago, I would normally be caught writing computer programs for some sort of environmental data analysis and would have defined myself via a hierarchical corporate job-class structure. But now, these are the things that wholly define my time, shape my body and challenge my mind; until death do us part.
The takeaway: anyone, everyone is not stuck and can reinvent themselves in any way that they need or want. We are put and put ourselves into categories, bins, etcetera based off where we came from and associated past experiences. If we want, we can switch it up and see each other for who we want to be and where we are going.